From the new day...




I was assigned a new hospice patient today. It was someone I knew for a period of time in years past. He has had a very challenged life with losing both of his parents while he was young, being placed in foster care, suffering physical and sexual abuse at the hands of many of his foster parents, and living a life that was affected throughout by all these losses and abuses. Despite his difficult life, he has held on to hope, to kindness and to gentleness. He is a great example of resilience. Not that he hasn't added to his problems with addictive behaviors and bad choices but he is able to get past all of these and still look forward and still be kind. Now he is 59 and in declining health with a terminal diagnosis of end stage COPD. He is tethered to his oxygen, and spends most of his day in a chair as even a short walk to the bathroom causes him to get out of breath. From his confinement in a rural trailer near the Pennsylvania and Maryland border, what purpose might he still have? Why did our paths cross again? Those answers I may never know fully but my familiar appearance allowed him to tell his complete story, from the beginning to nearing the end. He was determined to lay it all out on the table even though pauses were needed to catch his breath. His whole life in a nutshell - the good, the bad and the ugly. He talked about how hard it is to really know someone - to know their truth. And how we shouldn't judge.  I wondered if these were lessons learned or instructions passively given to  me.
Before I completed this post, my patient died. He was on service less than a week. I know there was a reason for us to reconnect, however, I may never really know why, but I am grateful for the chance to have seen him again and to be privileged to hearing his unique life story.