From the new day…

Sometimes, even as we are doing our best to live a good life, a life of caring, service and compassion, situations arise that challenge us, hurt us and leave us feeling very sad.  Regardless of the harsh impact of the situation, we may want to make it better. Or in a weak moment, we might want revenge of sorts. It is not unusual to have a variety of thoughts go through our heads as we try to process what happened and think of what should come next. Tonight, I was faced with all the above.

In some ways I felt like I was watching a movie of someone else’s life, because what was being said to me, and about me, made no sense. I listened, and at the appropriate times I spoke, but my accuser could not be reasoned with and the disturbed look in his eyes confirmed this fact.  Clearly, I was not able to correct misperceptions, or bring reality into his thought processes or help us come to any resolution.  

When I left his house, after this unsettling confrontation, I was overcome with a variety of emotions…anger, sadness, disbelief. I thought about what my response should be, fueled by my anger. I cried from the sadness and disbelief.  But as the evening progressed, and my compassionate side took over I calmed down and was able to move away from any thoughts of revengeful words or actions, but the sadness remained because the problem took on a new face. It transformed from my hurt to his pain - pain that he bore from issues never addressed and pain that could be buried no longer. When this realization came to me I worried about what was going on inside of him that was causing this pain to surface and be evidenced in the misdirected anger coming towards me. I wished I could help him. In the end, the day spoke clearly to me and said to give this situation over to a Higher Power, to surrender, realizing that it was beyond me and not within my control to change.

The affirmation on the surrender card in The Spiritual Beings of Light Oracle cards says, “I believe in the goodness of the Divine plan and I am surrendering the need for control.”

And so I have, but for him and his family, I will keep them in my prayers always.

Giving thanks for the blessing of this day...

 

From the new day…

As the evening air becomes cooler and the light of day is running short, it’s clear that fall is on its way, but summer is not over yet. This weekend I had the chance to immerse myself in this free and easy season when life is more about down time than a hectic pace and the outdoors is one big recreation room.  A weekend at the beach in Rehoboth provided some of the season’s finest offerings…buying local peaches and tomatoes at a road side stand…sitting on the beach with friends on Friday evening watching the changing colors of the sky as the dolphins entertained us in the water…the grandiosity of a summer thunderstorm…and a long walk on the beach on Sunday morning as the sun sparkled on the water, the sea spray lightly touched my skin and my footprints were left in the sand as my signature on a thank you note to summer.

The summer of 2012, like many others, was filled with seasonal pleasures…tending the gardens and seeing the beautiful results of this earthy work, filling the feeders and watching the golden finch and hummingbird return, sitting under the night sky imagining the expanse of the universe, driving with the windows down and the air blowing my hair, picking fruit with my grandchildren and seeing them love their first taste of blackberries, breathing in the summer air tinged with the scent of honeysuckle and seeing the lushness of the Pennsylvania woodlands. The pleasures are many.

Thank you summer! What fun you have been!

Giving thanks for the blessing of this day...

From the new day…

On the other end of the spectrum, from anticipation and excitement, are the emotions related to conclusion. When conclusion involves saying goodbye, tears are often part of the experience, especially with Kate and me.  And so, as the last day of our wonderful visit wound down, and we neared the time for Kate and her family to return to Colorado, tears were appearing.  From my perch on a rock in the back garden, I watched the children run laps around the field and when they were done and they plopped down breathlessly beside me, my tears could be restrained no longer. I hated to see this time end and know that months or even a year may go by before I see them again. Just then, the rest of the family came up behind us and said “Look, it’s a hummingbird!” At first I disagreed through my tears saying it was a bee, but as a clearer focus returned, I could see the tiny beak of a hummingbird baby enjoying the nectar of the butterfly bush. How magical was this moment! We all became still…even the kids… and watched in amazement at the size and movement of this tiny creature…well, until Lo’s three year old enthusiasm caused its quick exit.

By then however, he had cast his spell upon us and served his purpose. I do believe that this baby ruby throated charmer arrived in time to help us all better cope with the parting moment we were soon to face. Animal totems offer spiritual guidance and deliver messages if we are open to receiving them.

Among all the bird totems it is likely the Hummingbird is the most magical. They bring a smile to our face while watching their unique movement. Hummingbird’s ability to hover in one spot teaches us how to be still and focused no matter how active we are. When the hummingbird totem visits we are reminded to appreciate the sweetness life offers. We have all heard the saying "Stop to Smell the Roses" and understand this means to slow down and enjoy life. The hummingbird teaches a similar lesson asking us to bury our noses more deeply and inhale the fragrant nectar. Life offers much joy and sweetness if we take the time to breathe it in.

http://Healing.about.com/od/animaltotems

And so it was. The sweetness of this week was breathed in by all and the scent of the children, which lingers in my house, is fragrant nectar that heals the heart.

Giving thanks for the blessing of this day…

From the new day...

The list was not done. I still had much to do to have everything perfect for my special visitors who would be arriving around 5:00 this evening. But first I needed to sit in the shade of the maple tree, with chores temporarily put aside, and be in the moment of pure happiness and gratitude.  It’s so easy to keep moving and doing, but allowing ourselves time to feel what is in our heart, is the most significant part of our journey on this earth.

My heart was overwhelmed by emotions caused by the anticipation of seeing my daughter and her family who had not been back to Pennsylvania for 2 years. I couldn’t wait to see Kate, Eric and their 4 children and give hugs to all. I savored this anticipation as I sat in my yard and expressed silent prayers of thanks. When the moment arrived it was more perfect than I could have imagined. Even the little guys who are 3 and 2 and who had just woken up from naps in the car, ran to me and let me lift them in my arms and hug and kiss them and tell them I love them.

It was a perfect gathering of family. Truth be told, it really didn’t matter to anyone that I had cut the grass today or mopped the floor or washed the windows. Those details were irrelevant. What was most important was how we felt just being together and experiencing the joy of heart connections, the continuity of life and the serendipitous lessons that found their way into our world.

As we sat outside, eight year old Elika quickly picked out a rock in my garden to sit upon saying she was going to meditate there. She said it was full moon meditation tonight. I looked at her mom in amazement and asked if she knew that tonight really was the full moon meditation which I attend each month but of course missed this month for obvious reasons.

Kate was also amazed but said Elika remembers everything and maybe she had heard a conversation about this. I didn’t know Elika knew anything about meditation and yet she was serious in her intent to have this happen and even encouraged group participation.

 As the moon rose in the sky casting its' light upon us, we gathered in a semi-circle, my 2 daughters, 3 grandchildren and myself, and recited The Great Invocation, followed by a short period of meditation. I don’t know how this even came to be, it certainly wasn't on "the list", but the fact that it did for even a brief moment was a true gift and a sign that our children are the light of the future. How quickly the torch passes to another generation. On this night of my journey, I was touched by their light, their innocent goodness, and their sincere hearts. On this night I was blessed with love.

 Giving thanks for the blessing of this day…

From the new day…

The message of the weekend became very clear today. As I was kayaking on the peaceful evening water of Marsh Creek, the message could not be denied. It was “look up!” Yesterday, while watching the slow movements of a blue heron in the shallow water of its home pond, I was asked by a passerby if I had seen the goose in the tree.  Well, no, I hadn’t. Who would think to look for a goose in a tree?  But there he was, or maybe it was she, perched on a nest in the hollow of a dead tree limb. Presumably protecting its young, the goose hissed at me as I got too close for its comfort. What a pretty picture it made though, and one I would surely have missed had I not been instructed to look up.

Today, I heard the message again.  While kayaking, my eyes were scanning the tall trees that surrounded the lake. I spotted another blue heron, but this time it was perched near the top of a bare tree. My daughter and I paddled closer and sat quietly, being voyeurs of nature,  observing the heron's movements, until it took off and then we had the excitement of watching its distinct flying form take shape.  We then paddled a short distance parallel to the shoreline, and I spotted something else, something very rare. It was the first time I ever saw a bald eagle in the wild. There it stood, up high on the top of a leafless tree, in all its exposed majesty, looking just like you would expect, erect, observant and proud. I could hardly believe my eyes, especially after just seeing the heron. Another excited family of kayakers joined us when they realized what we were looking at. All of us watched it up high and then our eyes followed its path when it took off, allowing us to see its features, its coloring and observe the behavior of one of our national symbols.

"Look up!", the breath of this day said, and I listened and was rewarded. From beautiful architecture to pictures in the clouds to the wonders and mysteries of the night sky, looking up grants those who listen a myriad of visual blessings…another example of the universe giving and us receiving... if we are paying attention.

Giving thanks for the blessing of this day…

From the new day...

A few months ago, while I was seeing my hospice patients in a nursing home, I was greeted on the elevator by a resident of the facility. He asked “Have you seen anything new today?” I looked at him puzzlingly and said “No, I don’t think so.” He asked again and I shook my head as I thought about the question. He continued to look at me, waiting for an answer. As I shrugged my shoulders, I said “Not that I can think of, but maybe you have a different idea.”  With that, he responded, with the exuberant voice of a preacher, “A new day, a brand new day, like you’ve never seen before!”

 Where did that come from I thought to myself?! This normally quiet gentleman shuffles along slowly with a walker, has only a few teeth left in his mouth which you see because his bottom jaw juts forward exposing them, and he doesn’t have two cents to rub together.  He appears to have little in this world. But appearances are deceiving. While he may not have tangible wealth or be in the best health, he is clearly rich with joy and has a knowing that many people search their whole lives for and never find. And he’s absolutely right. I thought of him today, and I smiled.

He stayed with me throughout the day in spirit. For today the world was new as it breathed the intoxicating scents of honeysuckle and freshly mowed grass in my path.  It laid before me fields of buttercups and the sight of foals cuddling close to their mothers. 
                                               
The breath of this day carried on it the song of the birds, the laughter of children and the wind rushing by my ears as I biked along the back country roads.  Everything seemed laced with awe and wonder and my heart relished the joy that it brought.  An old man gave me new eyes today, and with them, I saw a new day, a brand new day, like I never saw before.

Giving thanks for the blessing of this day...

From the new day...

For much too long, darkness has shrouded the Philadelphia Archdiocese, but over the weekend a light shone through the darkness. In a corner of the city, in the oldest Catholic Church in town, I was a witness to the goodness and love of human beings, in contrast to the ugliness that has existed and that is currently on trial. While testimony continues regarding unthinkable and mishandled crimes, I saw the light of hope rising before me.

In the welcoming setting of Old St. Joseph’s church, the home of the Jesuits since 1733, joy and sincerity joined hands and the sanctuary became filled with the light and love of the divine.

The website of Old St. Joseph's boldly states “All are welcome”. Sadly, this is not true in all houses of worship. It also states the following:

We recognize that we cannot love God without loving our sisters and brothers. We acknowledge and respect the dignity and worth of every person, and we hear clearly Jesus' call to reach out to those in greatest need. Through our social justice and outreach programs, which we undertake without regard to race, religion, socioeconomic circumstances, or sexual orientation, we will show our solidarity with all men and women. In particular, we will care for those most in need, especially the hungry and the homeless, the sick and the lonely, and the disadvantaged children of our community, and we will advocate for social change on their behalf.

It is no wonder that my cousin chose this church as the setting for his wedding. The Jesuits  model the life that John and Camille emulate. A verse from the song they chose to have at the conclusion of their wedding celebration follows:

We are called to act with justice, we are called to love tenderly, we are called to serve one another; to walk humbly with God!

Incorporating such a song in the wedding, following readings of the same ilk, made a statement for all present to hear, about their intentions for how they will live their life. Their life experience has already shown that they are on this path. I would assume that the local clergy and the church hierarchy all began with idealism and strict ethics like John and Camille, but along the way, some of them became misguided. They lost their devotion to what is important and the temptations that face human beings won out.  There is a need for new energy and commitment and for lessons to be learned from this period in order to avoid a recurrence. 

John and Camille and other caring and ethically driven people like them are hope for the future. If their example can be utilized and their zeal become contagious, the tarnished Catholic Church has the chance to regain its full luster and truly be a beacon of light in this world, joining with other enlightened individuals and groups. The archdiocese, as well as the hierarchy of the Catholic Church, would be wise to adopt the Jesuit statement above as their daily mantra, reminding them how to live and to follow in the footsteps of Jesus. It’s that simple. Criticism of nuns, using gays as scapegoats, or perpetuating a culture of cover ups…these are not what the word is about. The word is about love. The word is love. And from love, light streams. It’s that simple. I saw it today.

Giving thanks for the blessing of this day...

From the new day...

A week ago I had the opportunity to take time off from work and go on a personal retreat. This was something I have contemplated doing for several years but had just not moved towards actually making it happen. Finally, I listened. The outcome was perfect. Each day spoke to me in so many wonderful and enriching ways. For now, here is a short poem that came to me one morning as I stood by the little water falls of the creek that flowed down the edge of the scenic "sanctuary" in the breathtaking blue ridge mountains.

Good Morning Creek

Flowing free

Laughing, dancing

Oh, to be

A drop of water

One with you

Joyful,

In your heaven.

Giving thanks for the blessing of these days...

From the new day…

Do you remember what was born 42 years ago today? April 22, 1970 saw the arrival of the first ever Earth Day, given birth by environmentalists who saw this planet on an expanding and alarming track towards destruction.

Since that time we have come a long way, in our understanding of the needs of the planet if it is to stay healthy, and of the negative effects that arise when human beings interact carelessly, thoughtlessly and selfishly with the world. The mission of the environmentalists needs to continue through the generations if future inhabitants want to enjoy a symbiotic and life-preserving relationship with their surrounds. To be fully connected with the environment however, one must slow down and treasure moments of silence, during which the world speaks in a language that all can understand. It is a language of love and joy and awe and it speaks directly to our heart.

I recently had the opportunity to enjoy the beauty of this language. It was during my first bike ride of the season. The backdrop was a series of country roads on a brilliantly perfect spring day. I had decided that while exercise is important, this was my first time out in 2012 so I would be gentle on myself. After about 5 miles, as I rode on a dirt and cinder road which was quite forested on both sides, I came to a clearing where I could see and hear the creek that meandered through the woods.  The steady song of the water tumbling over the rocks and around the bend was worthy of a break from pedaling to simply listen and feel the calming benefits of one of nature’s  perfect meditations. A little further on, as I passed a meadow with beautiful chestnut brown horses quietly taking in the afternoon sun, I noticed a blue heron fly overhead. These birds always excite me when I see their unique form in flight. This was another opportunity to stop what I was doing and just observe the path of this majestic bird. It flew gently and steadily, using the small creek below as its roadmap. The flight of the heron was mesmerizing. I watched until it could be seen no more as it became one with the sky. Nearing the end of the 20 mile ride I slowed down as I approached a pond and heard the familiar sounds of the peepers. Their appearance has always been elusive to me. The call of the peepers seemed to come from an invisible presence. This time was different. A few of their little heads were above the water in their natural habitat which included green growth over much of this wetland. Unfortunately, my arrival caused them to become silent, but I sat quietly on the bank and waited and in time I had the pleasure of observing their behavior and watching their throats swell as they made their distinct sound. The choir of peepers performed as their audience of one felt blessed to be in attendance at this private concert. The day was perfect. I enjoyed the freedom and pace of my bike which afforded me the chance to listen and observe creation up close. I slowed down to receive an increase in pleasure. In so doing I heard the language of the earth and it filled my heart with joy. The frenetic pace of life that is commonplace these days steals these moments from us. It is time to recapture the full essence of what the environmentalists were striving to preserve back in 1970.

My thought on this earth day is two-fold. The importance of respecting our planet is paramount and each of us needs to commit to being respectful children of Mother Earth. We also need to remember that the intricacies of this planet cannot be fully appreciated as we fly through our days, stressed beyond what is healthy. Why worry about preserving the environment if we don’t rejoice in the glory of it? Take time to see, hear and feel all that surrounds you and allow the melodious language of this world to fill your heart with its song.

Giving thanks for the blessing of this day…

From the new day...

Like a gift package adorned with the finest ribbons and bows, the gift of Spring arrived this year brilliantly decorated with an abundance of blossoms and blooms. An explosion of color and beauty suddenly surrounded us, ignited by the unusually warm temperatures. A magical Spring had begun.

The magic and miracles of the seasons always amaze me. Think about the crocuses in early Spring, that manage to fight their way through the packed winter earth to expose their colors of purple, yellow and white to the eyes of winter weary light seekers. Not so much as the top of their fragile petals are damaged in the course of digging out of their winter’s habitat where their shape and color form and mature in the darkness of the cold earth. You have to wonder how that is even possible. Maybe even more amazing as a harbinger of spring is the return of the ruby throated hummingbird. This tiny creature weighs in at only 1/8 of an ounce and is only 3 ½ inches long. It leaves its winter home, which may be Mexico, Central America or the Caribbean as the weather in the Eastern U.S. warms, and food supplies become available. It flies a few thousand miles over changing topography, through challenging weather conditions and all the way across the Gulf of Mexico. Their tiny wings flap 52 times per second on average but after billions of flaps, they arrive at their destination still intact. It hardly seems possible that something so small and fragile could make such a journey, and do it twice in a year!  Another recurrence in spring is the equinox when day and night are equal and the promise of gradually lengthening days lies ahead. We tend to take this for granted because it always was, but if you really think about the predictability of such a cosmic event, it is truly amazing. The whole notion of seasons could be thrown off if the earth’s axis shifted or the sun would change its placement. But these celestial bodies hold strong in their position, allowing us to feel the safety of routine.

Routine has its place and so does spontaneity. Today I was drawn to stop at one of my favorite nature preserves by a serendipitous occurrence. As I drove along the country road, I was listening to a CD that I had not heard for years. Much to my surprise, the song I heard was called Looking for fairies. This song played just before the turn off to the preserve. I received this gift of music in gratitude and felt that the day was speaking very clearly to me through this song.  Since I first discovered this preserve, I have had the feeling that it is the perfect place for fairies to thrive. When I cannot stop to walk along the stream or the hills, I always put my window down and say hello to these wonderful little beings that I know occupy treasured spaces in this preserve. While I have not seen them, I feel their presence. They have captured my heart and my imagination.  I know that many people snicker at the idea of anyone beyond preschool age believing in fairies, but consider the magic and the miracles that I have described above in the crocus and the hummingbird and the equinox.  How is it any less likely that the miracle of fairies is indeed a reality? They called to me today and I listened. I stopped and quietly took in the sounds and feelings of this environment. It was serene and nurturing. Perhaps they knew that was what I needed at that moment. As my heart opens fully to their existence, I hope to be privy to their world and delighted with visions that I have only been able to imagine. Creation is much grander than our eyes first see. Through prayer, meditation and focused mindfulness we can increase our awareness. With the enlightened vision of the sages, the miracles of creation and the presence of the divine can be seen in all things.

Giving thanks for the blessing of this day...

From the new day...

As a hospice social worker, I spend time every working day with people who are nearing end of life. Many of my patients have found positive meaning in their life; relate stories that demonstrate their feelings and are at peace with the idea that death may arrive at any time. Some willingly move towards death and even ask why it is taking so long. But there are also those patients who admit a fear of death, admit to a life that wasn’t well lived, or admit to holding onto anger or resentment. Their final days tend to be less peaceful.

I was immersed in a conversation today relating to peace as I attended training on Forgiveness in Psychotherapy. During the presentation I thought about my own journey with forgiveness and how the past 15 or 20 years has brought me many lessons, and thankfully growth, in this area. The hundreds of patients I have come to know while working in hospice, and the difference in their experiences approaching death, were also on my mind. For a peaceful death, it seems clear that forgiveness is essential – forgiveness of oneself and forgiveness of offenders.

Words of Eva Kor, a holocaust survivor, speaking about her captors, were included in the presentation. She said that after forgiveness and amnesty she finally “felt freedom from the burdens that life had inflicted on me.” The facilitator wrote “Learning the skills of forgiveness leads to demonstrable improvements in emotional, physical and interpersonal health.” Forgiveness is a choice. It is not forgetting or condoning. It is choosing to do something that in the end will bring you peace. And that peace will be yours, but it will also flow into the world through the positive and loving energy that will emanate from your being. It seems that forgiveness is key to peaceful survival of the individual and the human race. Hopefully the breath of this day will resonate around the world.   

Giving thanks for the blessing of this day...

From the new day...

March 17^th was gorgeous with blue skies, warm sun and temperatures feeling more like mid spring than the end of winter. Such a pleasant Saturday found me outside doing yard work, which I usually don’t begin for at least another month. I have 6 foot tall grasses that I never cut down after the season as they add a bit of movement and softness to the usually still and hard winter landscape, as well as create a privacy screen. Today however, it was time to tackle them so for about 4 hours I cut and cut each reed with hand clippers and then tried to divide this perennial in order to keep the size manageable, but the grasses won the battle and will likely grow bigger than ever this summer season. The base and roots are like a cement pier at this point and even a hatchet barely cut any of the roots away. How symbolic that is…the strength of our roots.

 As I worked, I thought about how the reeds were probably similar to the reeds that my grandfather used to thatch his roof in Ireland. That’s where my roots are strong, in Ireland. My mother told me that their house was once given an award for the home with the nicest appearance on the road between Dublin and County Mayo where they lived. Suddenly I felt surrounded by my ancestors, hard working country people. I realized that this activity was given to me today for a purpose – to connect me with my family who have all passed on – and to thank them for their contributions to making me and my life what it is today. And how amazing that today is St. Patrick’s day! As the Irish flag flew in front of my house, and the cut reeds lay strewn all over the lawn, I knew that this was no coincidence. Happily, I appreciated this gift, the wonder of connection across the planes, and gave thanks for my parents, my grandparents and all my extended family who today I felt in my midst.

Giving thanks for the blessing of this day...

The Breath of a New Day
Introduction 3/8/2012



Each day we are given the gift of a new day. With this gift comes the promise of the unknown, opportunities for growth and the chance to shape the 24 hour period into the design of our chosing.  Along the way, we will be surrounded by sights and sounds and people and things, all of which may communicate to us. Will we be ready to receive the communications? Or will we miss them? Being observant and listening, really listening with all of our powers, will give us the best chance to see and hear the messages, which are carried on the breath of the new day.  My hope is to share in this blog some of the messages that make their way into my awareness.